Spitting Image
by Scandalacious Intentions
Summary: ""What if people see her in me? What if they know who I am before I can even introduce myself? What if they judge before they even speak to me?"


**Disclaimer: I, I who have nothing…**

He was his own worst enemy. Much as Sirius hated to admit this, it was most certainly the case. He stared at his own reflection as though the face he saw there belonged to someone he had met before but could not place.

"Get over yourself." James nudged him backwards so he could mess his hair before he left for breakfast. "Christ, you're such a bloody Narcissist."

Sirius continued to stare over his friend's head and frowned, glowering at himself, peering deep into his bright silver eyes. He smiled faintly and moved on to his nose.

"You'll get wrinkles," James warned him. At the third lack of response, James turned and made eye contact for the first time. "What's the matter with you? Shouldn't you be trying to kiss the mirror by now?"

Sirius turned his head and followed an intricate pattern in the floor tiles. "The floor looks nice."

James sighed. "You've been inhaling Remus' bruise salve again, haven't you?"

For a moment, James thought his best friend had returned to his usual self.

"No, although that stuff smells strangely good."

James nodded. "I know. I've seen you fight to sit next to Remus when he's got it on."

Sirius smiled grimly. "I think I scared him."

"Just a bit," replied James. "In fairness, you scared me and it wasn't my neck you were trying to surreptitiously sniff."

They fell into silence and Sirius' gaze returned to the mirror.

"Sirius, really, what the hell is the matter with you?"

Sirius' mouth turned up at one end and he frowned, debating whether to ask the dreaded question. "James, do you think I look like my mother or my father?"

James was astounded. "What the hell does that-?" He took a deep breath. "I don't know, Sirius. I mean, you have your father's eyes and your father's hair but-"

Sirius nodded. "But I look like my mother?"

James bit his lip and shifted his weight. "Look, a bit, but it doesn't matter who you look like, does it? You're not actually your mother just because you've got the same cheekbones for heaven's sake."

"I know. I just-" Sirius broke off and sighed, running a hand through his hair. James was immeasurably envious as it fell back into the same position, still shining almost blue, still perfectly straight without a charm. "I just wanted to know."

"Is that why you've gone all gloomy on me, because you look like your old girl?"

Sirius sighed. "Don't worry about it."

"How can I not worry about you? Just bloody well tell me what's so wrong about it?"

Sirius rubbed his temples. "You wouldn't understand if I told you, alright? Just forget it."

James grabbed his wrist as he tried to leave. "Neither of us is going anywhere, mate."

"What if people see her in me? What if they know who I am before I can even introduce myself? What if they judge before they even speak to me? I mean, Remus had that whole thing with his dad when he found out I was a Black and if John was any more laid back, he'd be dead. Slughorn still gives me strange looks when he passes me in the corridor like I'm some sort of abomination of nature."

James bit back his smile. "I'm sure he doesn't, Sirius. I've never seen him do it."

"Well I have!"

James held his hands up in a gesture of surrender. "Alright, alright, so he gives you funny looks. I stand corrected."

"My parents think I'm some sort of freak. They bloody well hate me."

James smiled grimly. There was no denying it; not really. "Hate is a very strong word, Sirius. They just need time to adjust."

Sirius stared at him, incredulous. "You're joking, right? I had that bitch's hands round my throat."

"I don't know what to say."

"I knew you wouldn't."

The knocking shut them up and almost immediately Sirius apologised.

"Please don't tell me you two are still doing your hair?" Lupin opened the door. "You pair really are the vainest people in existence." One look at Sirius' face told him that something was indeed very wrong. "What's the matter? You look like I feel. Is it a spot?"

James laughed. "Much worse. It might be that boil coming back."

"Fuck off!"

James and Lupin laughed and the latter shoved Sirius away from the mirror. "Bloody hell, Pad, you need prising away from this thing." He pulled out another grey hair. "It's the stress," he muttered. "I keep worrying that he'll find himself in front of a reflective surface and we won't be there to drag him away before he starves to death."

"Remus, who would you say I looked like?"

Lupin turned and raised an eyebrow. "It's a funny thing, mate. You look just like a friend of mine. Sirius Black - do you know him? You're the spitting image."

He turned back to the mirror with no idea of the impact his sarcasm had had on his friend until he felt an arm around his neck. Lupin froze and murmured, "But I haven't even used the salve."

Sirius beamed at him. "I look like me." With that, he flung the door open and announced his intention to wake Peter with shaving foam.

Lupin slowly turned to James. "Alright, what the hell's going on?"

James shook his head and laughed. "Long story. Mate, seriously, don't ask."


End file.
